I'm fail ady..T.T

Till nw,tat gal din find me o..i think she juz 'fu yan' take my phone number then delete ady..Zzz..mayb i'm juz too scary n 'yang soi'..i'm feel reli down bout it,cuz first time take gal phone number fail 2 do so..i think i won't ever try 2 take again..dunwan 2 disappoint myself again..when i went 2 kasturi,i'm thinking hw 2 react when c her there leh..veri paiseh d..act lik strangers or say hi..luckily i din go say hi,she's like din meet me b4..so i aso act stranger lor..so paiseh..
dun get me wrong o..she juz someone i wanted 2 noe as a fren oni..there's already a gal i'm waiting for..although my frens all disagree tat we will b together again n some even giv me some 'advise'....i noe they care bout n wanna help me..bt i still goin 2 wait..
along tis waiting period..from January till nw,August..i'm din truely happy b4..i'm in sorrow n pain for everyday...

1st time driving..today i went 4 driving lesson!

Today..2pm i went to the old KFC 2 wait for the aunty to come n fetch me to my first drving lesson..wahoo..i was so nervous..when the aunty reach ady,as soon as i gt in the car..she straight ask me "do u noe hw 2 drive?" walau..i was shocked 4 awhile..i'm wondering if i say i noe,is she goin 2 ask me drive all the way..of course i said i duno la..i wan her 2 teach me properly first o..alwiz safety first!Then she drive 2 an empty parking lot..she told me bout the gearbox,panels n other stuff lik tat..then change seat..haha..tat time my heart was juz beating lik crazy..mayb reach 250 beats per min..haha..jkjk la..so i'm juz duno wat 2 do..she asked me 2 start the car,then drive around the parking lot..making many turns o..turn left then turn right..right left right left..after tat,reverse..a tricky part 4 me,my reverse technique suck..n the side mirror i duno hw 2 c leh..when nervous ntg can be done right..after reverse o..she asked me 2 drive out 2 the road..walau,tis time i'm shocked n at the same time scare..driving inside the parking lot,my sweat ady dropping lik bathing ady..nw on the road woh,my sweat r lik pouring rain..bt the rain happening inside the car..haha..so i'm damn nervous..juz listen wat aunty goin instruct lor..walau,when on the road ar,the aunty gt so many things said o..step tis,dun step tat,do tis,so tat..haha..listen till i gonna sot liao..when on the road i made so many mistakes o..my car 'die' at least 4 times leh..i most remembered d is when the traffic light go green ady,my car 'die'..haha..so paiseh..then the aunty ask me 2 drive 2 the driving institut..she gt some paper works nid 2 do..after tat,is time 2 go bac..tat time i gt the hang of it ady..nt so many mistakes were made..haha..great progress o..i'm aso a bit calm when on the trip bac home..
I sure won't forget tis day..surely after many decades,when i'm old..i will tell my grandkids bout tis experience d..they sure will laugh d..n they will say 2 me "so lame d o,those car veri easy 2 get used 2 it d..nw wif the 'modern flying car' oni hard 2 learn mah"..haha..oh well..

1st time ask a GIRL for her phone number!

Today i went 4 tuition at kasturi..there is tis gal,she's quite cute d..so i decided 2 take her phone number lor..haha..bt week after week i fail 2 do so cuz tis is my 1st time taking a gal phone number..so i'm damn nervous d..everytime i try 2 get close or even open my mouth 2 ask her,i juz dun hav d courage 2 do it..so damn useless..
Bt today..hahaa..i done it..actually,Er..hw should i say tis..nt actually get her phone number la..bt i reli gt go ask her d leh..tat feeling is juz too great 2 bare..my adrenaline concentration was so high after i asked her..haha..so shuang..she take my phone number said will find me eventually..Erm,does it count as success leh?duno o...bt tis is the best 1st time asking a gal 4 her phone number of my life..sure won't forget tis experince..n it's reli will help me in the future 2 b brave enough 2 ask a gal 4 phone number straight away!
WAHOOOOO....

Broke into Tears

Today the heaven broke into tears
Little by little
Is like the heaven understand my feelings
It expressed what I wanted to express
Express out all the sadness,sorrow,loneliness
I still feel the same after it help me expressed
Maybe that is just not enough
Zzz..I'm going nuts here
This few days i felt the coldness feeling
It's as cold as dry ice
What's colder than dry ice?
That feeling!
Cold till I just don't know how to describe it
There's only conversation when something is needed
Not to just chat..
Few days back,I was sick like hell..
my head is just twist and turn till can't concentrate in class
I don't even have the strength to go recess
I'm all wore out like an old pair of shoe
My friends are so caring
They kept asking me how I felt
I can feel it
It's the power of friendship!
That made me felt better but I was waiting..
just waiting..waiting...waiting
Then school over,I give up waiting..
I knew is on my own this time
That time i felt so lonely..just so damn lonely

A Clown..

Some said clown make other people happy
Some said clown make people happy but sad inside
Clown is the symbol of happiness
but the clown himself doesn't feel happy at all
the clown is just getting pay to feel happy
but behind those happy faces lies the true face
the face of sorrow
the clown need to hide all his sorrow
in the deepest,darkest part of his mind
for himself to share and not others
not even a leak of sorrow is out
if not that will effect the joy of others
others doesn't care about what's the clown going through
they are just here for the clown to make them happy
tat's all
Does anybody really know what does the clown really feel?
Only the clown know his own feelings
Only I know what's his feeling
Because I going through too
My feelings are all kept for myself
nobody to share with or chat about it
The world is just too lonely and too sorrow
eventhough there are billions of human in this world
I am alone!